


You Are Lovely

by twenty_one_plants



Series: Cobwebs and Flies Come Out [1]
Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mute!Tyler, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Abuse, Self-Harm, Songfic, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, based on the song Lovely, i kinda tried????, josh takes care of tyler, okay regardless of these tags this is fluffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-22
Updated: 2015-06-22
Packaged: 2018-04-05 13:15:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4181163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twenty_one_plants/pseuds/twenty_one_plants
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tyler scribbles on the notebook paper, turning it to show Josh. </p><p> <br/>'Josh, I need to tell you something. Get your laptop.’</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are Lovely

_You say things with your mouth_

 

 

Crumpled letters passed. ‘Josh, can I get some water?’

 

 

_Cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

Josh looks down at the writing on the paper, nodding quickly as his friend sat on the couch, tired and tearstained.

 

 

_I hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow_

 

 

Josh goes into the kitchen, making sure to get the water from the pitcher beside the sink. No one was allowed to use the sink unless Tyler was out of earshot. There was a long story behind that, Tyler didn’t want Josh to know. He had told Josh he didn't feel comfortable saying it, writing that on another note from his manilla notepad.

 

 

_Luckily I can read your mind_

 

 

It’s been _six years_ since Tyler has uttered a single word. What a shame, too. The boy had a beautiful voice, that was when they were in a band. They might’ve made it big. They might’ve. Tyler daily writes a note to Josh with shaky writing that _always_ says the same thing.

 

 

_Flies and cobwebs unwind_

 

 

‘I’m sorry I ruined our dream.’

 

 

_They will not take you down_

 

 

Each time Josh would drop the thin sheet of paper, holding Tyler tight in his arms. It’s a cycle for the mute. _Always_ a cycle. _Always._

 

 

_They will not cast you out_

 

 

Josh returns with the cup of water filled by the pitcher. “Here you go, _baby boy.”_

Tyler gains a soft smile when Josh calls him that. Josh always called Tyler baby boy since they first started dating. _Five_ years ago. Tyler felt needed whenever he was called this. It makes him feel… _safe. Loved._ Like he won’t get hurt _again._

 

 

_Dear friend, here we are again pretending_

 

 

Sips of water. Tyler clears his throat as the water flows down. Flowing like a kitchen faucet. That noise. _No_. Tyler smiles warmly, scribbling down something on his notepad as he absentmindedly sips on the water. He sets his pen down and flips the notepad to Josh, so Josh could read it.

 

 

_To understand how you think your world is ending_

 

 

‘Thank you Josh. I love you.’

 

 

_Sending signals and red flags in waves_

 

 

Josh giggles softly, leaning over and capturing Tyler’s lips into a soft kiss once he sets down the cup in front of him on the coffee table. Tyler makes a soft twitch of surprise, kissing back at his boyfriend.

 

 

_It's hard to tell the difference between blood and water these days_

 

 

Josh pulls away with a soft noise, a grunt of content. “I love you _so, so much_ baby boy. Can I do anything for you?”

 

 

_I'll pray that one day you see_

 

 

A note is passed. ‘Get me some more paper, please. I’m running low. I wanna keep talking to you, Joshua.’

 

 

_The only difference between life and dying_

 

 

Josh nods, quickly looking around for paper. Where was the stock pile of paper? They got so much earlier in the year… Josh finds it, grabbing a stack of papers. He comes back and sits beside Tyler on their couch.

 

 

_Is one is trying, that's all we're called to do_

 

As soon as Tyler gets the extra paper, he quickly scribbles on the paper. ‘You know, you’re really pretty Joshua. I love your eyes.’

Josh giggles, sliding up close to Tyler. His hands gently slide along Tyler’s core, Tyler blushing and scooting into Josh’s hold. He scribbles something down.

‘I love you soooo much Josh.’

 

 

_So try to love me and I'll try to save you_

 

 

Josh carefully folds Tyler into his lap, nuzzling at the taller’s neck. Tyler squirms slightly, smiling back at Josh. Tyler scribbles.

‘That tickles man.’

Josh smiles happily. “I know, baby boy.”

 

 

_Won't you stay alive_

 

 

A few days later and Josh lets himself into Tyler’s apartment after work.

“Tyler? Where you at, baby boy?”

Josh walks around wearily. Tyler normally sat on the floor beside the door walking into the house. He _wasn’t_ there. “T- _Tyler?”_

 

 

_I'll take you on a ride_

 

 

A crunching, crackling noise of rope resounds from the hallway leading to Tyler’s room. Tyler stares at the noose he had hung. _Never_ able to speak again. _Hands_ all over _his_ body, _his_ thighs, chest… pushing him under. Under. _Under._

 

 

_I will make you believe you are lovely_

 

 

Words couldn’t come easy. _Ever._ Not after having fingers shoved down his throat, _tainting_ his insides.

Tyler collapses to the hall floor, dusty from a lack of cleaning. Tyler was dusty.

He was _still_ tainted in his mind.

 

 

_Your redemption won't grow stale_

 

 

 _Tainted._ A tainted boy didn’t need to survive.

 

 

_We are now just setting sail_

 

 

Josh turns the corner into the hallway. “T-Tyler? Why do you… _Tyler, w-were you gonna…”_

Tyler doesn’t speak. He _never_ fucking does.

 

 

_On the seas of what we fear_

 

 

The rope is thrown out. Josh is sitting carefully with Tyler in a blanket fort he threw together as Tyler took a bath.

 

 

_Treason now is growing near to me_

 

 

The bath. Scrubbing skin until it _bled._ _Nothing_ would get rid of the _feeling._ Hands everywhere _. Sobbing._ Tears mixing with bubbles, warm bath water, and _blood._

 

 

_I'm coming clean_

 

 

Tarnished skin. Handprints _all_ over, handprints in his _mouth,_ a residue that _never comes off._

 

 

_God, hit me straight on_

 

 

A person that isn’t heard when he says _no._

 

 

_Won't you stay alive_

 

 

 _That’s_ why Tyler can’t speak.

 

 

_I'll take you on a ride_

 

 

All because of one little word.

 

 

_I will make you believe you are lovely_

 

 

‘Josh, I need to tell you something. Get your laptop.’

Josh blinks, nodding. “You can tell me _anything,_ baby boy. I _promise.”_

The laptop is put into Tyler’s hands.

 

 

_Won't you stay alive_

 

 

Tyler’s fingers fly across the keyboard, Josh reading along while Tyler types.

 

 

_I'll take you on a ride_

 

 

‘Let me tell you why I’m mute.’

 

 

_I will make you believe you are lovely_

 

 

Josh gulps at the second line, setting a hand carefully on Tyler’s knee, careful. _Loving._

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

‘Let me tell you why I cry when you turn on the kitchen sink and the bathtub.’

 

 

_I hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow_

 

 

Josh reads along as Tyler types. _Horror. Oh fuck. No. This isn’t good. No._

 

 

_Lovely_

 

 

Tears slide down Josh’s cheeks. His Tyler? _Hurt? Touched? Oh god._

 

 

_I can read your mind_

 

 

Tyler’s fingers are slowing, shaking, carefully picking out the next words. Tyler’s voice was a jumble of keyboard clicks. _Digital._

 

 

_Don't be gone_

 

 

The way Josh scoops Tyler up into a hug isn’t digital.

The way Josh pets Tyler’s short hair and how he whispers sweet nothings, sweet everythings into Tyler’s ears isn’t keyboard clicks or notebook paper or a pencil or a pen on skin.

The way Josh tells Tyler over and over _“I love you,”_ and _“No one will ever do that again to you,”_   and _"You aren't tainted, you're so strong, Tyler,"_ isn’t like red, scraped skin from trying to get words and feelings and touches off.

 

 

_Don't be gone_

 

 

It’s _love._ And a voice Tyler needs. _Acceptance. Assurance._ The scrapes dull, his heart swells.

 

 

_Don't be gone_

 

 

Josh trembles, holding Tyler so close in his chest, deathly grip never wanting to let go. No one would hurt his baby boy.

 

 

_Don't be gone_

 

 

Tyler opens and closes his mouth, unsure of how to feel. It’s many emotions. Confronting the past head on with a laptop as a weapon. Unbeknownst to Tyler, he had an arsenal of weapons to fight back at the droning drip of a kitchen sink, the sound of a faucet rushing into a tub as he scraped his skin off to finally clean himself.

 

 

_Don't be gone_

 

 

His weapon was _Josh._ Josh’s _belief_ in Tyler. _Josh’s_ love. Tyler feels strong for the _first_ time in _six years,_ Josh is helping. _Josh_ is _helping._

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

The handprints disappear slowly. The residue is lightening up.

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

The mean words, the rejection of a simple no. It feels better. _It feels._ Tyler can actually feel, burrowing further against Josh as Josh refuses to let go.

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

Rope in the trash, a creaking of a noose. It sounds in Tyler’s ears. _Fear. Tyler is so scared._

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

“Tyler, I fucking _promise_ I _won’t_ let go of you. _I promise._ I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again, oh god, my baby boy.. oh _god…_ I love you… I love you _so_ much, it _isn’t_ your fault. You _aren’t_ tainted, you _aren’t.”_

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

Tyler swallows, nodding against Josh’s chest as he sits up to look at the laptop, screen illuminating the bedroom. A new air of _safety_ comes over him rather than _edginess_ in the bedroom. Tyler picks up the laptop.

“Tyler? Are you gonna tell me something?” 

Tyler shakes his head.

Josh sighs softly, sitting in front of Tyler. “I love you _so_ much, Tyler.”

 

 

_You say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out_

 

 

Tyler closes the laptop and sets it beside him on the bed. His lips part and a weak, soft noise comes out. The scrubbing is gone, the handprints are gone.

The memories of six years ago  _are_ there, but he can _survive._

Josh’s eyes widen at what Tyler does.

 

“I l-love... y...ou, Josh-...ua."

**Author's Note:**

> A big thank you to kawaiidun for basically helping me (discussing) this idea with me! Love you dork.


End file.
